Can you believe it? I swear every year it just flies by a little faster! I guess no chance of it slowing down anytime soon! It's wierd to think for the last TWO New years I have been pregnant, and two years ago I was just 18 days away from seeing Carson for the first time! WOW! That was one of the most amazing days of my life!!!
Well today is New years eve and I guess tonight we will go over to Derek's parents house for a little get together! My mom is still here but her and my sister will be spending the New years at my sister's aunt( my mother ex sister in law)! Today is kind of a hard day for me! I won't really get into why but exactly 12 years ago, something horrific happened to me that forever changed my life. New years eve is always a hard day for me to see come. I never feel very EXCITED that day, and although I don't let the "incident" hold me down, I just can't help but wish I had a reason to rejoice this day instead of dread it! I don't hold bad feelings or hate in my heart, but subconciously for some reason I can't let myself just get through this day without feeling a little down!!! God has brought me a long way since "it" happened, but I also still have a LONG, LONG, way to go!
Well only 6 more days until I am a studen full time! I am so excited! I have all my books and I am ready to go! I feel so proud of myself for doing this and everyday I see little reminders that I think God gives me that this is truly my calling!! Infact, just the other day I got a little "Atlanta Daily Journal" thing in the mail that wasn't even really supposed to be for me, it was for the women who lived here long before us and it was about nursing and the main editorial was about a Labor and Delivery Nurse who also worked in the Mother/Baby unit(Which are the two places I plan to work) It was just another little nudge from God in my eyes!
I am really starting to think I am loosing my mind about Camden! No lie, I have been to the dr. every week (with the exception of last week, although he did have that NASTY stomach bug) for the past 2 months with him! I can't imagine why he has been such a sickly child! He is over the stomach bug, but for the last 3 days now he has been acting so strange. He cries unconsolibly when he is tired. He has NEVER done this before. He is always waking up in the middle of the night crying and that is NOT him, because he has slept soundly through the night for months now!!! Another thing strange is we started him on solids about a month ago, and the last two week he has totally REFUSED to even try eating them! No matter when I try and feed him (it could be before a bottle, after a bottle, in the middle of a bottle) he starts SCREAMING hysterically as soon as he sees the spoon! It just BAFFELS me! He was doing soo good eating solids, we had NO issues, and now it is like it horrifies him! I just dont get it! I tried to research it online but found nothing worth reading! *Sigh* I am just going to stop trying for a few weeks and see if that does the trick!!
Well off to do MOMMY duty lol!
Park City Utah
2 years ago
I have a holiday that is a bad memory for me too. It's hard enough when something happens on a regular day, but a holiday just makes it seem so much worse! I'm sorry Camden has been sick! Addison is sick right now and it isn't fun. I'm also having problems with solids. She was eating great for a couple of months and no refuses. It has been this way for a few weeks now. She will be smiling at me and the moment I put the spoon towards her she ducks her head down and seals her mouth shut! And if I keep trying she just cries. Wierd.
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