Sunday, January 25, 2009

"You're gonna miss this"

So if you have never heard that song by Trace Adkins, than you need to! Everytime it comes on the radio it is a constant reminder to savor each phase of life because once it's gone you will miss it! Through out all the trials of life I can already tell that is so true! I already miss the little things my babies aren't doing anymore. With Camden, I already miss that newborn phase(although with these sleepless nights, I almost feel I am still in it) I miss that soft sweet newborn smell. The little yawns and grunts. I miss those little newborn nursing sessions we had, and I miss that baby soft, fresh out of the womb, newborn skin!! With Carson I miss his newborn days too, but now I have more to miss of him. I miss those first walking weeks. You know, the ones where they kind of teeter-totter around and fall every few steps. I miss the first few words he could only speak. I miss his signature crawl(He NEVER EVER learned to get up on all fours, instead he did the army crawl up until he could walk.) the way he looked like he had no use of his legs because he would drag them and make his arms do all the work. I know that a year from now I will have all new things with both of them to miss. Don't get me wrong, I do delight in all their new milestones and changes, but I miss their past milestones too!!!

As much as I love my kids, I need a break occasionally!! These all night waking sessions have been taking their toll on me and I think my husband was starting to see that himself! I know without a doubt I have bit his head off a time or two just because I am so ill from not getting the amount of sleep I need. Well, Yesterday he called me around lunch(he had to work) and told me to have the kids bags packed to stay at a sitters for a few hours and for me to get myself looking pretty! As tired as I was, I jumped at the chance to enjoy some time with just the two of us and be kid free for a few hours. That evening we dropped the kids at his sisters and he took me down to Tally, where we enjoyed a nice romantic dinner at Macaroni Grill! It was DELICIOUS if I do say so myself!!! Honestly, though I would of been just as pleased if he had told me we were going to drop the kids off and go home and sleep a few hours! haha!!! It is so strange to me how anxious I was to have a break, but how much I missed Carson and Camden when we were gone. I know it was just a couple of hours, but I found myslef thinking of all the cute little things they do and wanting to be with them again! Don't know if that was quite the feeling at 2.m with Camden awake this morning, but that is besides the point lol!

I am really starting to wonder what is wrong with Camden and why he is waking up so much! I prayed all throughout my house that anything Ungodly that may be bothering my little guys will leave at once, but still no relief! Last night he was up at 1, 2, and 5! I mean he isn't a newborn anymore and even when he was he slept ALOT better than he does now!!! So what is the DEAL!?

After church today, I noticed Carson's eye was pink and pussfilled. My first thought was," Great he has pink eye and its a sunday!" Lucky for me a Pediatric dr. goes to our church, so I tracked him down and he gave me a perscription for some antibiotic drops! I am praying his eye is clear tomorrow because I have school and so does he and I don't want him spreading it to anyone else(even though I am 100% positive that is probably where he picked it up) I prayed that God will put a hedge around all the kids in the nursery at church and Camden too, I don't want them picking it up either! I wouldn't have even taken him to church had I known, but this morning his eye was fine.

Anyways that is all that is going on here. Must go and get dinner going! Please keep these babies (AND ALL NICU babies) in you'r prayers!


Thursday, January 22, 2009

Alot to catch up on!

Life is so busy! Sometimes I don't even feel like I have time in the day to sleep! Haha I know I need sleep, but I feel instead of sleeping my time would be better spent cleaning and doing all the things I can't seem to fit in during the day!!! Of course, my body always reminds my mind that if it doesn't get sleep it will go on strike and be even less productive the next day!! haha! Guess my body wins!!!

School is going soo good! I am loving it and everyday I feel one step closer to reaching my goal!!! My teachers are the kind of teachers you always wish for. The kind that keep you interested in what they are saying, and explain things in ways that are easily understood! I so wish I had teachers like this in high school, maybe then I would enjoyed it a little more! I am meeting all kinds of nice new people too!! I think that will be handy when I need study buddies!!! :)

I just realized ya know, I don't blog alot about Derek! Trust me, I love him to death, but I guess because I don't have alot of complaints when it comes to him that I feel I don't have much to say! I think I feel blogging about how much I love him, or how great he is will just bore everyone so I should spare you! Haha!! Well one thing I do want to share with you, is we are going through a "Life Enrichment Program" through this church in Pelham, and the purpose is let go of anything from the past(mostly refferring to before Derek and I) and bring us closer together! We aren't doing it because we have "marriage problems" we are doing it because we know God is working through us and is giving this to us as an oppourtunity to fall even more inlove! Through this program it enables you to let go of maybe past loves, relationships, and generational things that have been in your family. So far it has already made a huge impact on us and at the end of the program we get the chance to renew our vows and marry again with the cleanest of slates. I am sooooooo excited about this and think it will make our marriage that much stronger!!!

Camden's little tooth is growing right it! I think it may still be bothering him though, or maybe another tooth is trying to emerge too? He has still been fussy and his little cheeks are bright red. His gums look really red too. I feel for the little guy because my experiences with tooth pain are NO FUN!!! I pray God just gets him through this teething thing fast and painless!!!!

Carson had his 2 year check up monday! He was 30 pounds! WOW!!!!! I can't believe it! My baby that started off at 7lbs 15 ozs and 19 3/4 inches is now 30 whole pounds and 34 and 1/4 inches long! 2 years of growth does alot! He is so amazing and I thank God for making me his mom everyday!!!

Well off to sleep!

Oh one more thing! Please pray for these babies. I have been following both of their mommies blogs and both of these precious little ones are in NICU's currently and are struggling! :


Monday, January 19, 2009

Carson's 2nd and Sleepless Nights!

Well Carson's 2nd birthday party was a hit!!! We had the best time. We started off the day with me cooking breakfast. I thought Carson might enjoyed some scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast! Then we all got ready and headed to the church to decorate. It turned out really cute, and the gym was such a perfect place to have the party! I knew Carson would need a good nap before the party, so about 12:30 I took him back to our house and let him sleep until it was time to leave again! Renting the bounce house was GENIUS!!! The kids had so much fun piling in and bouncing around! Alot of people showed up and Carson racked up on the presents! We were soo thankful and blessed by everyone who showed up to support Carson on his big day!!!! We really saw how loved our Son is!!!!!

Now to the sleepless nights. Well basically for the last month this is how my sleep pattern has gone: 9.p.m.-Put kids to sleep
10-11p.m.-Put SELF to sleep
12:30a.m.-Camden is crying(go put Paci in mouth)
1:30 a.m.- Carson is crying(go see whats wrong)
3:30 a.m- Camden is crying again (fix bottle or give him paci)
5:00 a.m.- Carson is crying( Go change diaper and get him back to sleep)

I feel like I am not getting ANY sleep! I can't figured out what in the world is going on with my kids! Some of you maybe thinking maybe I should just let them cry it out and self soothe, but the problem with that is then I risk them waking up the other. Some of you maybe wondering if Carson is getting caffeine or sugar and I can honestly answer NOO to those questions. I am terribly picky about what my kids eat and drink. Carson NEVER gets tea or soda no matter what! I do give him cookies, or fruit snacks occasionally but I am really really really on top of his sugar intake! I just don't know what the problem is! All I know for sure is that I don't know how long I am going to be able to keep functioning like this! In fact, last night during the 3:30 waking I felt tears filling my eyes. I thought to myself," I JUST WANT SLEEP!" Both my kids have always been such AWESOME sleepers and now it has done a 360!! What is going on! Well if ANYONE reading this has any suggestions, PLEASE let me know I am getting desperate here!

Friday, January 16, 2009

Tomorrow my big boy turns 2!

I am just amazed at how fast 2 years has gone by! We are all set and ready for his party, but since the weather is going to be so cold, we have changed the location to our church gym! We are still having the bounce house, but thankfully it will all be indoors, so no one will have to worry about the outside weather! I will def. blog about his party later!

Well Camden had his 6 month checkup today! Hard to believe he is 6 months already! I am sure I will be saying he is 2 years too before I know it! As of today he weighs 18lbs and 13 ozs and is 27 and 1/4 inches long! Compared to Carson at this age, he is over a pound bigger than he was, but the same height! The dr. said he is growing beautifully and right in the 50% for his height and weight! We have also figured out what was bothering him so much a few weeks back, HE HAS A TOOTH! Yesterday, he grabbed my finger and a nice, pointy, white speck bit it! I was soo proud! Carson was almost 8 Months before he got his first tooth, so I wasn't quite expecting to see one in Camden's mouth soo soon! Glad I know what was bothering him though!

Well that is all for now, lots to do!

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Who knew Poopie was soo exciting?!?!?!?!

We have had a potty for Carson for about 6 months now! We stupidly bought the fanciest one. It sings and has all the bells and whistle. Carson really thinks of it more of a toy, than something he should sit on to do his business. The reason we bought it so early, was because Carson was showing signs(or so we thought) that he was ready to start potty training. He would tell us EVERY time he went(of course AFTER the deed was done) and he was taking off his diaper and occasionally going on the floor! We figured going ahead and buying a potty was the sensable thing to do, that way if he wanted to try it was there and ready to go. We never PUSHED him into doing it, but occasionally would ask "Do you want to go use the big boy potty?" Most of the time Carson would sit there a few minuiets, do nothing, and get up and start playing with all the gadgets on it that make noise! Well, a few night ago right before bed, Carson says to Derek, "I need TEETEE(which is what he says for pee)" and Derek knew there was no way he wet his diaper that fast because he had just changed it, so he told Carson to show him what he meant. Carson jumped out of his bed, ran to his potty, pull his pants down and sat on it. He never ended up doing anything, but we were totally impressed at his effort! So last night, he looks at Derek again and says, " I need STINKY" So Derek tells him, "ok lets go to your potty!" Carson does and sits there for a seconds and next thing I know the potty is singing telling Carson, "HE DID IT!" I was skeptical at first, thinking the potty just was sensitive and thought he went, but when Carson stood up he sure enough did!!! I wish we had a camera vidoeing our reactions lol!! We all jumped and praised Carson for a good 10 minuiets! We ran around the house saying "Carson poopied in the potty!" and we gave him a sucker! haha who knew poopie was soo exciting! We still arent' going to push him to do it, after all he is JUST turning two, but we do plan on encouraging it when we can!!!

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Camden is a FAT BOY!

I can't believe how big he is!! I know he weights at LEAST 18 and a half pounds, maybe more! He is a good big bigger than Carson was at this age!! He has rollie pollie legs, and chunky cheeks and I could just eat him up!!! I sure love that baby! Here is a picture of him reaching for me to get him out of his bouncy


4 More days until Carson's birthday! I am getting so excited! The weather is supposed to be sunny but cold! I am just thanking God it isn't going to rain!!! I have been telling Carson his birthday is saturday, but I don't think he really gets it! I keep telling him how much fun he will have and he smiles so big, but he has no idea that it really is his birthday! I told him,""we have a big surprise for you!" and he said "GIGI!" (which is what he calls my mom) and that just broke my heart because I was referring to his bounce house, and he was thining my mom would be here instead! I am so proud of the big brother he is! I love seeing my boys together. They are adorable!


School is going so good! I am really enjoying it! I love getting up and getting ready and doing something productive for the day! speaking of, I need to get ready~

Sunday, January 11, 2009

I love the weekends!

It is so nice to just be able to relax, spend time with the kids and hubby and not worry about having to go anywhere! Besides the lack of sleep, this weekend was pretty darn good! Friday, we didn't do too much of anything, I made dinner and we basically just hung out at home! Saturday, we went to town, picked up Derek's 4 wheeler, did a little grocery shopping and came home! That night I agreed to let Derek have a little "guy time"(I try and do that at least once or twice a month because I know he needs time to do guy things and be a man and not just a workaholic/hubby/dad!)He and his friend JJ went and worked on their 4 wheelers and just were GUYS for the night, and one of my best friends Kimi and I went down to tally with the kids and did some shopping for Carson's bday!! Kimi spoils Carson, We went to old navy and the children's place and she bought him so many cute clothes for his bday and a new toy too! I guess because she doesn't have kids of her own yet, she likes spoiling other peoples! I am def. not complaining because although I would NEVER expect her to spend that kind of money on my kids, I love that she loves them that much!! WE had a good time! Sunday we went to church, hit Fallon's for lunch and came home and cleaned! We desperately needed to catch up on some cleaning and my loving hubby pitched in and helped too!

Tomorrow it's BACK TO SCHOOL, for me and Carson! I am looking forward to it, because I really am enjoying school! This weekend I even found myself wanting to get a head start on homework( I know, WEIRD RIGHT?) I guess I just want to do the best I can do! Camden will start staying with Derek's mom tomorrow and I must admit I am a little nervous! I trust her of course, but anytime I have to leave Camden with someone knew I always worry a little! I worry they won't understand his "needy" ways, and not know all the little tips and tricks I know to make him happy! I know Derek's mom is perfectly capable of taking care of him, but I just am a mom and it's my job to worry about my babies! Camden is growing so much! 6 Months already, and getting more adorable daily! I know you should NEVER do this, but I find myself comparing him to Carson. He isn't doing things quite as fast as Carson did, but I am not stressing about it because I know every baby develops different! Camden isn't sitting up yet, but I don't think it will be too long before he is! He is however, holding his own bottle, rolling over both ways, and he just started the most adorable thing, that when I go to get him out of his jumparoo he reaches up for me! I am going to take a picture next time so everyone can see! It is the most precious thing! He has a 6 month checkup on Friday, so I will have to update things then for sure!

Carson will be 2 in less than a week and I am so looking forward to his party! I have been reminiscing about this time two years ago and even this time last year! So many memories already! I remember how this time TWO years ago, I was huge and miserable! I wanted to meet Carson so bad. I couldn't have known then how much he would change my life! I never imagined that I would be meeting someone who would fit the perfect cliche "LOVE at first sight." I couldn't have dreamed he would of impacted how I looked at the world around me and how this whole new me would be born with him. I couldn't have pictured how much more he would make me fall in love with Derek! Even this time last year, I remember he had just started walking! I remember how adorable I thought he was, and how I was so scared that having another baby was going to somehow take something away from him(I was pregnant with Camden then). Now I look at my family and see how perfect we all fit together; I see how much loved can be shared between 4 people and can't imagine life any other way!

Friday, January 9, 2009

I am too old to be pulling all nighters!

So last night was pure HELL! I have no idea what is going on! Was it a full moon or something? Carson woke up ( I swear I am not exaggerating) every hour! I would hear him crying, and go in his room and he would be standing my his door just hysterical! He wasn't running a fever and I don't see any physical signs that something is wrong with him all I know is he was waking up hourly and I have no idea WHY! The baby woke up 3 times himself, (which is probably due to hearing Carson crying) but thank goodness for me all it took to get him back to sleep was putting his paci back in his mouth! Carson on the other hand I had to make him some warm milk every time he woke up and change his diaper in order for him to go back to sleep! If I tried to leave before changing him, he was quickly say," Mama, mama I pee pee!" So I am guessing I have in total had somewhere around 4 hours of sleep and that is just not going to cut if for me! I sometimes wonder if I didn't have kids and was single would I be a party animal and be pulling all nighters, but honestly, I don't think so. I am one of those people that needs at least 8 hours to feel even halfway normal during the day, and anything less than that, I am cranky, nauseated, and just no fun to deal with! I would not even be up this early if it wasn't for the fact our carpets are being cleaned at 9 and so me and Camden have to be out of the house for a few hours!! I am tempted to rent a hotel room and go sleep hahahaha! unfortunately, I can't do that, but I am thinking about just running to town while they actually do the carpets, picking up a few things I need and then just coming home and keeping Camden and myself in my bed for a while! Then at least we hopefully won't be on the carpets!

I am so glad I don't have school today! I would not be much of a student as tired as I am! I felt back sending Carson to school today, but he was awake anyway and I thought what the heck? Weather I send him or not, he is still going to be awake so I am better off sending him and letting him wear himself out at school, hopefully take a good nap there and then sleep really good tonight!!!! Please pray that he DOES actually sleep tonight!

Well hopefully this coffee will jump start me at least for a few hours!

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Surprisingly, I am not too exhausted!

I am actually AMAZING myself! I am going to school full time, and still managing to be a good mommy and wife! I still am able to clean, cook, bath kids, and do homework all in an afternoons time and I am not feeling dog tired! I am really proud of myself! Derek is proud of me too! He keeps telling me that! I have to admit that feels really good because Derek isn't really the type to just HAND you praise unless he really means it! He keeps looking at me while I am doing my homework and saying, " babe, I am proud of you!" Those words are soo encouraging, you just don't know!

School is not easy! I am enjoying it, but I never would of dreamed I have forgotten SO much since high school! I am really, really, really trying to concentrate hard in math class because that is def. my weakness! I have never been good at math, but I am determined to do really good in this class no matter how much studying or even tutoring help is involved! I know that I can really see I am going to enjoy my english class already! I LOVE english, only thing is I took a diagnostic test which is one of our first homework assignments, and it said I am not good at knowing where to place commas- WHO KNEW!? Maybe I need a little work on punctuation, because I am not sure where: or ; little things go either! Guess alot of that has worn off since high school too!!!

Carson is adjusting well to Noah's ark! Although he does come home a little cranky in the afternoons, I think I can just chalk that up to his sleep schedule being totally changed! The week before he started daycare I started putting him to bed earlier and earlier each night until I got his bed time down to 9 p.m! I figured 9p.m.-7a.m should be plenty of sleep for him and he gets a 2 hour nap at school, but for some reason he comes home very irritable! I think he is not used to so much stimulation and activity and interruption in his sleeping schedule! Oh well I hope it evens itself all out soon!!

Camden is adjusting well too! When I get home from school I love seeing his big "I LOVE YOU" grin! I can always tell he is happy to see me! He is getting back to his normal self! He is even eating BABY FOOD AGAIN! YAYYYY!!! We still never quite figured out what was wrong with him, but that is ok as long as its GONE! He is doing soo good sleeping in his own room and I even think I am sleeping better with him in there! Maybe that is what he needed?

Well I need to get some sleep, I have school tomorrow but its my last day until MONDAY!

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

The start of a new me!

Well today is officially my first day of school! I am so nervous and excited! It is such a different nervous than when you are younger and in highschool or something! Back them I am sure my nervousness was more due to what people would think about me, what I make new friends, etc, and now my nerves are more jittery about how will I do?? I am so ready though! This is going to open up a whole new me! I am determined to do this and I will give it my all!! I will let you all know how it went!

So, yesterday was Carson's first day of daycare! It was strange, because I felt like a kid on Christmas, I couldn't sleep because I was soo excited to take him and see what it was going to be like! He woke up around 7:20, so I got him dressed and we headed off to school! The whole way I kept telling him how much fun he was going to have, and how he would just LOVE it! WE got there and I got him out and all his stuff too! We walked in , and there were lots of kids everywhere! The director greeted us, and took us back to his classroom where I hung up his little book bag, and put his diapers and wipes in his cubby! I could tell he was scared. He was holding onto my leg the whole time, but I just kept my cool like everything would be ok! We walked back into the main area and there was a table full of kids eating breakfast (yesterday they had milk and cereal and some juice) I asked Carson if he would like to eat too, and he sat right down! Food is always a good way to get Carson's attention lol! As soon as he started eating, he looked up at me and said, "bye mama!" I am sure you can imagine the look of SHOCK on my face! I didn't even have to tell him bye first, he was actually READY for me to go!! So off I went! That made me feel good! No screaming baby, begging me not to leave! That afternoon, when I picked him up they were all outside playing! I sat there and watched him for a second without getting his attention and he looked like he was having a blast! They said he was great! They said he was full of life and they had no problems with him at all! I was glad to hear that, I don't ever want to think of Carson sitting at some school, crying his little heart out for mom and dad! I want to know he played and had fun and didn't think about us not being there!

I knew today it was going to be a whole different story though! Today is the first day DEREK took him and he said he cried! Carson is kind of a daddy's boy! Derek will more than likely be taking him in the mornings because that is just what works out better, and I will be picking him up after I get out of school! Hopefully he will adjust to Derek taking him and not cry! I hate to think about that, but I know he usually cries regardless of WHERE we are when Derek leaves, so I know it is not just school!

Well Camden STILL isn't too happy about eating baby food! I tried again last night with some sweet potatoes, and he wasn't having it! I wish I could get this face he makes on video. When I put the spoon to his mouth, he shuts his lips as tight as he can and scrunches his nose at me! It is too funny! How amazing is it, that at his little age he is still perfectly capable of letting you know he ISN'T going to do something! Also, was the first night he actually slept in his own room! I had a hard time letting him go! I wanted him in my room, I liked knowing he was next to me! I made the decision though, and thought we would just give it a try and see what happened! He did GREAT! He only woke once about 4 and I fed him and he went back to sleep! Maybe he was ready to go in his own room! So I am hoping this goes well!!

Anyways, I gotta get ready for school!

Sunday, January 4, 2009

What a weekend!

So if this weekend has sure been full of surprises! As you probably read in my last post, my mom and sister were set to leave yesterday! Their flight left around 3:30 so we all piled the car about 1 and headed down to tally! We dropped them off at the airport, said our tearful goodbye and went our separate ways! Not 20 mins later we get a call saying their flight was cancelled due to weather and they would now not be able to leave until Monday!!! Part of me was thrilled I was getting another day and a half with them, but the other part was aggravated we made that trip for nothing, and not only that but would have to make it again MONDAY morning to get them to their new flight! Oh well, life goes on I guess! So anyways, they are still here needless to say!

Tomorrow my Carson starts daycare! I am soo excited! I think my expectations are a little over the top, because I keep seeing us walking through the doors and him walking proudly into his little classroom and settling right in, but I am also trying to just accept that fact that more than likely he will be scared his first day, and not really want me to leave him there! Either way he will have to just get used to it, and I think it will end up being a great experience for him and such a growing process! I am soo excited knowing he will learn all kinds of new things and soon he will be teaching them to me too! We started telling him his birthday is coming soon! I told him that he will be turning two! Now, when you say,"Carson how old are you?" he says, "TWO!!!!" It is soo adorable! I went ahead and got his party supplies while we were in Tallahassee at Target because they had the cutest Sesame street party stuff! That is his theme this year!!!! His first birthday was pretty much a disaster! First of all it was supposed to be outside, but it POURED rain all day that day soo it had to be moved inside! Second, I choose for the party to start at 12 (BADDDDD idea, that was his nap time, and now for the life of me I can't figure out what in my head told me to make his party for that time) Thirdly, I served Chili! I made a BIG batch full thinking I would have more than enough, and unfortunately that WASN'T the case! We ran out before everyone could get some!! This year, I have planned a lot better I think. I choose to have the party from 2:30-4:30(that way he can get a nice nap before hand), I am only serving some finger foods(although they will be GOOD i am sure, not just Chips, but like meatballs, and yummy stuff)that way I don't have to FUSS with making a big meal! Also, weather permitting, it will work out that we can have it outside! We are renting a BIG moon bounce which will just make Carson's whole year because he LOVES those things! I am kinda picky about my house, I like it clean, and this will be ALOT less stressful!!!!! Outside, two year olds can run, play, and not have me walking behind them cleaning up every spill, and mess they make!! haha! Soo every night when I say my prayers, I say "God, I know you are busy, but PLEASE make January 17th, sunny but not too hot(70 degrees would be PERFECT), and no chances of rain, or humidity, and a light breeze wouldn't be soo bad either!" haha

Camden is still UNHAPPY! Last night we did get more sleep, but I think that was more due to the sheer fact that we were BOTH soo exhausted we had to sleep in order to function!! He has been irritable all day, and I am still not completely sure why! Oh well hopefully whatever is bothering him will phase itself out soon!!!!

Well off the Publix!

Saturday, January 3, 2009

My patience are wearing thin!

I feel guilty even saying that, but I am not sure how much more I can take with Camden before I just SCREAM! He is up all night, not sleeping during the day, and CRYING constantly! Nothing makes him happy! This isn't my baby!! He has always been such a happy, good natured, calm child, and now, I JUST DONT KNOW!! I need sleep! A person can't live on 4 hours a night! If I only knew what was wrong! Derek and I started to think maybe it is a tooth afterall! We don't see or feel one coming in, but that is the ONLY thing that seems logical and makes since!!! It's difficult to say though, because Carson was such an easier teether! Infact, we never even knew he was teething, we would just find a tooth in his mouth one day and say WOW that was a breeze! All I know for sure is this MUST end soon! I start school Tuesday and there is no way I can function as a student, wife, and mother on the amount of sleep I am getting!!!

Today my mom leaves and I am NOT happy about that either! I wish she could stay forever, but I know that just isn't possible!!!! I have had the best time having her and my sister here, and I know it won't be too long until I see them again, but not having my mom around full time is really hard for me! I wish she was here to see every little thing the kids do, and be here for all their "firsts"! I wish she lived close enough that I could drive to her house if I was having a bad day, or just needed to talk! Hopefully one day she will, but until then I will just enjoy the time I do get with her!!!

Well this is a short one! I have lots to do. I will blog more later!

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Please Don't MAKE ME!!!!!

CLEAN THAT IS! I have so much cleaning to do that it isn't funny! Everywhere I look, I am reminded of something that needs cleaning! I am dreading it! I don't want to do it! Maybe it can just wait a little longer? I know it must be done though. Especially with me starting school next week, I won't have much time to do it then. I think I will just do some basics for now, you know just enough to make everything APPEAR nice, and then do some deep cleaning Sunday!...Yes, that sounds like a plan!!!

Well, my New years eve wasn't too bad! I found myself being occupied more than I thought I would, and unable to focus on BAD New years pasts! Camden was still VERY fussy and I am STILL not sure what is wrong with him! I dont see or feel teeth, so I can kind of take that off the list. As stupid as I felt doing it, I decided to take him to the Dr. yesterday! I didn't want to do it,but my mommy instincts were telling me something wasn't right with him, and I had tried everything I knew to do. I knew if I didn't take him and he I ended up finding out later it was another ear infection I would feel even worse about it, so I said," What the heck? If nothing is wrong, well at least I will have that peac of mind!" So off I went, My normal Ped. dr. wasn't there so I had to see another man who I liked very much! When they called me back, his nurse asked " So what is going on with Camden today?" I told her I really didn't know! I explained that he was soo fussy and waking several times nightly and just unconsolable most of the day for a few days now!" She then asked if he had been running a fever, vomiting, diahhrea, loss of appitite?" and of course I had to answer "NO" to all those things (although I did tell her her had a stomach bug last week) She then ROLLED her eyes at me and said, "The dr. will be in a minuite!" As offended as I probably should of been, I can see her side of it. Here sits a women bringing in a child who is not showing any signs of a sickness, except he is "fussy". I then felt even dumber, thinking to myself WHAT AM I DOING HERE? At last, the dr. comes in and I quickly blurt out" I PROMISE I AM NOT A CRAZY WOMEN, and I don't enjoy coming to the dr. but I know my baby and I know when he isn't himself!" and he laughs and says, "I don't doubt you, what do you think is wrong with you'r son!" I explain, that I don't really know but he is not acting himself and I can't find anything wrong with him so I wanted him to be checked and make sure his ears were ok" Of course the Dr. checks up from head to toe and can't find a darn thing wrong with him! Of course I am relieved to hear this, but I am still wondering why Camden is so irratable! I leave the office feeling relieved and stupid, but hey at least I knew Camden didn't have an ear infection or something else that I would have no idea how to look for at home.

So, Last night we all pilled over to Derek's parents who were hosting a family kind of New years get together! Everyone brought a mexican dish which was actually kinda nice and something new! It was DELICIOUS of course! We all just sat around and ate, talked, and played games! Catch phrase is always a hoot!! It was fun times! Camden was soo extremely irritable the whole time that basically everyone took pity on me and took turns walking him. That is the ONLY thing that would get him to calm down. He wouldnt' DARE let you try and sit even for a second! Walking was the only thing that seemed to work. By about 10:15 I could no longer take the crying so I decided as much as I didn't want to , it was time to leave! By this time I think everyone had taken a fair turn walking, and Derek and I had both tried everything we could think of and since nothing was working we just decided to go home! I think everyone was sad to see us go, but also relieved the SCREAMING baby was going too lol! We got home, got the kids ready and got them to sleep! Another night of waking though! Camden woke up at 2 and again at 5 crying his little heart out! I wish I knew what was bothering him, because it is making me hurt too!! Maybe it will end soon!!!! PRAY IT DOES!!

Well both the kids are napping, and I must do a few things while they do! Hope everyone has a blessed year this year, and that we all make positive changes in our lives!